why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I smell like Dick and happiness
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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