Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
