It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Boobs are out for the taking
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
