I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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