We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
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She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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