Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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