yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
