accomplished twins. life is a go
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
