I wannas sexs uuuuu
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
