I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
