Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize