It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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