So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Who died my cat blue again?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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