Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You may now shotgun with the bride
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
