Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
we're making bets on your personal life
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
