I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
