3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
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He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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