Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
