Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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