Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
