you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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