No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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