i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
