are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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