So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
