My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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