Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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