Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
