Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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