The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
this is an emotional support booty call
We're too hungover to prance.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
