If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
