I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
