wat bout pragnant strippers??
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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