Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
You have to summon your inner elephant
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
