I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You pole danced in your parka.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize