Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
