Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
