He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
