Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
