I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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