i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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