I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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