I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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