If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
