Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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