I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You have to summon your inner elephant
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
