I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize