I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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