how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize