Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
