Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
